It's all I can think about now.

Got home tonight and feel like I'm walking around with no purpose except not sitting down for too long. Maybe it's better described as when you have 10x too much caffeine in your body and you sit down, stand up, walk around, and all you want to do are the things you can't sit still long enough to do. I just want to scream- DONT YOU KNOW WHATS COMING?!?!

How can you not acknowledge it every time you talk to me this month?

How can you not read my mind and know when things slow down thats where I end up. That day, over and over and over and over in my mind.

How can you try to plan things for that weekend? Like I can do things that weekend.

What am I supposed to do?! Just tell me what I'm supposed to do.

I just want to scream anything. and everything. and all the time. The screams are running through my blood, making me antsy and anxious. Making me think, and not think. Making me want to cry and not be able to cry. Making me mad. Just plain mad at anything that I can be mad at.

I do not want to do this week again. ever. and it keeps coming back.