Shine the Light

"As we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same." -Marianne Williamson

I'm needing some inspiration lately. I'm feeling like I'm just in a regular old, get-up-everyday-and-make-it-through-work mood. I want to feel inspired.

We've been through a lot lately- a wedding, a move, another move, a small apartment, I started a new job, Nick's started a new job. Those are some big things.

I want a direction again and I'm hoping once things take a regular hold of our lives, we will have some time to find more passion in our hobbies. Or more hobbies, more inspiration, more excitement. We will find a way, I'm sure. At this point I'm looking for others to inspire me :)

(that was a pretty pointless post)

Becoming a Mrs.- The Party (Part 2)

Once we were married we were completely on a high.

After some formal pictures...

(Sorry some of these are so big :/)

We cheered with the bridal party on the limo to the reception, came in the secret back entrance, went up in the big elevator to enter from the grand staircase.

Upstairs we got to see how beautiful the place looked all set up, and we got to primp a little and take out my vale. Our parents and bridal party were introduced down the grand staircase to the song "Forever" by Chris Brown. In case you're not sure what that is, it's the song in the Youtube video that the Office spoofed for Jim and Pam's wedding. It rocked. Nick and I enjoyed watching everyone walk in and cheered for all of them!

We came in to "Home" by Edward Sharpe and the Magnetic Zeros.

Dad gave a fantastic toast, and everyone filed into their seats.

We greeted some people there, ate dinner, heard fantastic MOH and BM toasts. Let me say that I know again I am a bit biased, but these toasts were phenomenal. Firstly the videographer rolled up RIGHT in front of them, big light and all, and I looked to my MOH and said "umm sorry about that- good luck!" But they were great! No one talked too long, no one talked about inside jokes the whole time, and there weren't too many tears shed. MOH went first, making it funny, touching on the first trip Nick and I took, how much she heard about Nick, and something I told her about a week before about how Nick and I decided that if we need to talk the day of our wedding we would. I remember telling her, just as she recounted, that he was the only person who could calm me down if need be. She did a great job!! BM (unbeknownst to MOH, the person we visited on our first trip together) also talked about our visit, about how he was hesitant to like me before making sure I wouldn't break Nick's 3-times-too-big heart, and how all he heard about after that was me. We even toasted with Jameson, compliments to the weekend we met in Manhattan, KS.

It all went so fast, we ate a little, tried to talk to a few tables
(spent most of that time talking to my special friends!)
and then it was cake time.

The only bite of cake I had that night was the small bite Nick fed me, ever so sweetly.


The only bite of cake Nick had was the bite of cake I shoved into his face. The pictures kinda look like I punched out some teeth, but that's just mean.


We did our first dance,


I danced with my dad,


Nick danced with his mom


and step-mom.



We did the anniversary dance, there was some fun and laughter and then...

WE BROKE IT DOWNNNNNN!

The party part of this evening was probably the best party ever! I danced, danced, and danced some more. Nick danced, smoked cigars outside in the unseasonably warm weather, and danced. We drank, laughed, made rounds, and celebrated.

Friends and family filled the dance floor the entire night. As it got close to midnight there were top hats and crowns and everyone had poppers and noise makers. We brought in the new year, sent silver sparkling confetti flying, and kissed at midnight- our first midnight as a married couple!

More dancing followed, uniforms slowly fell off throughout the night, we drank from a stetson, there was the worm, some Michael Jackson moves, and my brother slid on the floor like a breakdancer. Nick and I left at the right time- I was laying on the floor happy and ready. The next day, even with our slight headaches, we kept recounting memories of how awesome the night was.

The whole weekend never could have been close to as amazing as it was without all the contributing parties; my parents, nick's parents, my seven bridesmaids, Nick's seven groomsmen, our 4 small attendants, the ushers, the readers, and all of those people who helped out without acknowledgement. Thank you, thank you, a million times thank you!

Again, professional photos complements of Steven Mastroianni at www.smastro.com

Becoming a Mrs. (Part One)

The wedding- the spotty version as I remember it:

I can't say enough how beautiful, and (literally) perfect everything was for our wedding. Everyone probably says that, but for ours it is true ;)

As the girls and I were waiting in the back room of the church, it was too early for me to put my dress on and the guests began to arrive. Now, it may just have been my endorphins but I began to notice a warm glow take over.

It was the vision I had all along, that I recognized as soon as it took shape, but I could never place it before that night. It was my wedding, as I have always known it.

Nick arrived with his men and all my girls watched from the window, teasing me about how I had to stand in the back corner. I said aloud "I guess I can officially say we're REALLY getting married!"

I step into my dress and my bridesmaid zipped it up with no hesitation. I have to pause a second and tell you how completely thrilled I was that the dress fit so exactly right. About a week earlier it was very, very tight and I was slightly uncomfortable with the way it clung to me.

All day I'd been saying that I was anxious, excited, but not nervous. It was true; I was confident. In no way, shape or form did I feel like this wasn't exactly what we were supposed to be doing.

All my ladies wrote a message on the bottom of my shoes, my something blue.

Dress on, photographer and videographer in the building, someone came back in our room and said, "We're sending people to the balcony!" Awesome- let's pack 'em in!

Sparkling shoes, something borrowed garter and I'm dressed.

At one point as I asked my MOH if she saw Nick out there and she replied, "I see you dad and a LOT of uniforms." That made me so thrilled and even more anxious!

Then it proceeded:

Time for the mothers. Nick's Step-Mom and Mom go down the isle, then my mom and my brother.

Bridesmaids turn... but I hang back because guests are still arriving. MOH hangs with me, we have a little moment. No idea what we said but I wouldn't have wanted anyone else with me :)

Ok, her turn.

I come out, dad tears up.

I'm so ready.

I hear the music, I love it.

They close the doors... we get in place.

One cousin fixes my train, hair, etc. while the other organizes our pre wedding secret (possibly my favorite part).

Our song starts and we see everyone stand.

We wait.

Doors open, we smile and here we go. I don't remember faces from the first half of our walk, I looked straight at Nick. He looked perfect.

I saw my uncle and aunt, I saw my bridesmaids, I saw my brother. I looked back at Nick as he bends his head down and wipes his eyes. I thought for a split second "Wow! I'm not bawling!"

Then we just rolled forward.

Hugged my dad, grabbed Nicks arm and it was over in 20 min.

We were married! I remember toward the end thinking that we got to kiss soon and I was excited.

Then we left, man and wife.

We read the inside of each wedding band because we had them engraved without telling the other one what it said. We loved that our engravings were so similar.

Nick loved my dress, I loved being with him again.

It was magical, as I guess I always hoped it would be. It was very "us"- we wrote our vows, we picked a place, flew in a pastor, had our closest friends. There was meaning behind most every thing. It was special, and perfect, and I can't imagine a single thing changed to make it any more so.

-- All the professional photos were taken by our outstanding photographer- find him here! Steven Mastroianni Photography

(to be continued...update on the part next time...)